SyFy Syucks

Let's see how many ways we can trash the abomination that used to be called the SciFi Channel...

And they all start with their catchphrase... "SyFy: Imagine Greater".

SyFy: Imagine Greater... but expect far less.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... just not on our budget.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... as long as it's being performed by professional wrestlers from the WWE.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... now imagine it in a bikini... with palm trees... and she's handing you a beer...

SyFy: Imagine Greater... as long as "Greater" is defined as being in Europe.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... imagine how "Greater" it would be if we actually put as much effort into giving you better quality movies as we did in paying for our campaign to tell you how "Greater" we want you to "Imagine" us to be.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... but in the meantime here's another "Twilight Zone Marathon".

SyFy: Imagine Greater... in 13-week cycles that show up once every two years.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... because the BBC told us to stop pestering them for more "Doctor Who" episodes.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... as long as the good parts are all censored and covered with mosaic bubbles.

SyFy: Imagine Greater... because if you don't we'll have to resort to having everything done in 3-D with the stupid glasses!

SyFy: Imagine Greater... because we need you to forget about those episodes of "Star Trek", "Firefly", and "Dark Shadows".

SyFy: Imagine Greater... because we ran out of stuff to imagine about.