Friday, August 12, 2005

Here’s a good argument to legalize marijuana…

Two good reasons to make pot legal…

  • Oil hitting $67 per barrel.
  • Gas hitting $2.50 per gallon in Atlanta.
Why? Because of hysterical speculation from the oil markets!

We need to dope these bastards up and get them to mellow out! Maybe then the market won’t be going into a hissy fit just because some sheik stubs his toe in Saudi Arabia.

By the way, where are all of these so-called "watchdog" politicians who claim to be on "our" side on this matter? Where are all of the politicians who are bitching and crying about social "loopholes" that allow people to act without the blessings of some government agency? We have trucking companies on the verge of bankruptcy because of these high gas and oil prices! You’d think that at least the Teamsters would be sounding off on this stuff, right? Where are the unions on this subject? Where’s the AFL-CIO (or what’s left of them) now?

Where’s Elliot Spitzer? You know, the famed antitrust super-prosecutor? Why isn’t he going after the oil companies? Why isn’t he investigating the oil speculators?

Where are the liberals on this subject? Oh, yeah, that’s right, I forgot… many of them are being oil apologists, talking about how gas NEEDS to be this damned high so it can match what Europeans are paying thanks to their tax-gouging social programs.

Meanwhile, of course, hard-earning Americans are getting GOUGED at the pump. We are getting SCREWED OVER because of these damned oil speculators.

Someone needs to ship every one of these oil "experts" to Amsterdam and lock them in a hashish store for the weekend. Let them chill out and dine on hash brownies for a few days. Then bring them back to the markets and watch the price of oil drop to about $10 a barrel.

"What? Some loser in the mid-east is threatening to bomb refineries? Duuuuude! Give him some munchies and let him chill!"

"Some tanker captain got stoned and made a wrong turn in the ocean. Whoa… no more for him!"

"What do you mean there’s not enough oil? Dude, there’s enough oil to last DECADES! Chill down and have some of this blunt! We’re gonna, like, bring the price of oil down a bit and get people to calm down and all because there’s just too much stress."

Hey, I can see it now… gas crunch solved by getting world market high!

As Judy Tennuda says… "it can happen!"

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