The Phony Red/Blue BS Game Ends

Well it turns out that the whole red-state/blue-state phony drama surrounding the latest incarnation of "Dancing with the Stars" is over with.

In case you have a life outside of Washington DC, here’s a quick recap…

Bible-thumping freedom-hating conservatives found out that liberal talk show host Jerry Springer (now formerly of Air America Radio) was competing in "Dancing with the Stars". This was not acceptable to them. They’ve been trying to get rid of Springer for years without too much success. So a certain former member of Congress who got his hands caught in the Jack Abramoff cookie jar decided that his new mission in life was to make sure that Springer’s appearance on that show was as brief as possible. It was bad enough that a WWE superstar and a former Playboy Playmate were the previous winners of the show, the conservatives wanted someone "wholesome" and "decent" for CONSERVATIVES to root for. So they put their support behind country singer Sara Evans. She’s attractive, she’s conservative, and she’s squeaky clean. (Plus she has a nice set of lungs… did I just say that? Well damn it’s true!)

So once again we have a red-state/blue-state pissing contest… but not over power. Instead it’s over a second-rate talent contest.

Week after week after week supporters, did everything possible to keep both players in the show. They couldn’t dance to please the judges, so their only reason why they were in there were the fans. Heck, even Springer was telling people that he was expecting to leave on the first elimination!

Well the pissing contest is hereby OVER with!

Sara Evans is done. She’s quit the show. Not only that, but she’s filed for divorce, claiming that her husband (who once ran for Congress) cheated on her.

Well that’s too bad, conservatives. Another one of your champions has fallen short.

Now normally I wouldn’t say this for conservative champions, but I actually feel sorry for Sara. I mean, I’m sure that she had every intention on following through with doing the show for however long she would have lasted. BUT she just couldn’t follow through this time. And it’s hard to be such a devoted conservative when you find out that your husband has certain views that doesn’t match with the true conservative mold that was generated for her public image.

No doubt in true conservative fashion, her husband will probably declare that he’s addicted to alcohol and porn (one of her actual claims for divorce), go into rehab and then come out "born again" in order to salvage their marriage. That’s how these things usually work out.

Of course it would help if the husband got a job too. A laid-off conservative? That’s about as inconceivable as a "family values" politician getting caught sending lewd messages to teenage boys… oh... wait a minute... never mind.